Hello, I’m Trisha and I have a problem.
I have infertility brain. It is a sad disorder where all your conscious and sometimes unconscious thoughts revolve around your own infertility. Sadly there is only one cure…a positive pregnancy test. But there is also a high risk that once you do see that positive pregnancy test you may develop pregnancy brain. It is a vicious cycle.
Yesterday was so draining, both mentally and physically. It surprises me sometimes how much all this stuff can seep into my brain. Last night after the discussion with our RE about our options I had a frightening dream. I dreamed that we had moved on to using injectables to make me ovulate. With injectables there is a higher risk of multiples (Kate plus 8). Which frankly scares me to death. I think we could do twins. It would be hard, but we could do it. Triplets? Yeah, no. More? Kill me now. In my dream last night we went in to the doctor to see how many follicles had developed. 109. On each ovary.
I think I need to get out more. Although I did ask J how he felt about 218 babies. He kinda looked at me like I was crazy. Good stuff. Oh by the way, I made him look up a picture of Kate Gosselin while she was pregnant with sextuplets. SO funny. I thought he was gonna cry he was so frightened.
Moral of the story…do not read infertility blogs right before bed after having discussions with your infertility specialist. Side effects are terrify dreams of impossible feats.