Infertility brain

Hello, I’m Trisha and I have a problem.

*Hello Trisha* 

I have infertility brain. It is a sad disorder where all your conscious and sometimes unconscious thoughts revolve around your own infertility. Sadly there is only one cure…a positive pregnancy test. But there is also a high risk that once you do see that positive pregnancy test you may develop pregnancy brain. It is a vicious cycle.

Yesterday was so draining, both mentally and physically. It surprises me sometimes how much all this stuff can seep into my brain. Last night after the discussion with our RE about our options I had a frightening dream. I dreamed that we had moved on to using injectables to make me ovulate. With injectables there is a higher risk of multiples (Kate plus 8). Which frankly scares me to death. I think we could do twins. It would be hard, but we could do it. Triplets? Yeah, no. More? Kill me now. In my dream last night we went in to the doctor to see how many follicles had developed. 109. On each ovary.

I think I need to get out more. Although I did ask J how he felt about 218 babies. He kinda looked at me like I was crazy. Good stuff. Oh by the way, I made him look up a picture of Kate Gosselin while she was pregnant with sextuplets. SO funny. I thought he was gonna cry he was so frightened.

Moral of the story…do not read infertility blogs right before bed after having discussions with your infertility specialist. Side effects are terrify dreams of  impossible feats.

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6 Comments

Filed under BABIES!, Crazy? I'm not crazy!, Infertility

6 responses to “Infertility brain

  1. Infertility brain is real! Just ask my husband who never knows what will trigger a breakdown for me. The most benign comment will link to infertility in my mind and I lose it. Let me know if you find a way to forget!

    • I will and please let me know if you find a solution. It is pretty crazy how something not even remotely related to babies will somehow go there in my mind. Stupid brain.

  2. This post really made me laugh. It’s so true. Infertility makes you think about everything just a little differently. When I finally got my second line (BFP) last December following the transfer of three adopted embryos my BETA was so high they thought I was having triplets. Thankfully our first ultrasound showed just one very healthy baby. During the time leading up to the ultrasound my husband was measuring the back seats of our cars to determine if three car seats would fit!

    • That is too funny. My husband said he would be thrilled with triplets, but that is just because he wouldn’t be at home with them all day! I don’t think I have that much patience, but who knows, maybe I’ll surprise myself one day.

  3. Rachel @ Eggs In A Row

    Welcome to the club. Your turn to bring juice boxes and orange slices is next week. 🙂

  4. I’ve read through a few of your posts after finding you through someone’s blogroll. I feel like I’m reading my own brain! 🙂

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