This time I want to send out thanks to you. Yes, you. All the people who read this blog and who responded to my last post, from the bottom of my heart, thank you.
Your comments meant so much to me. I don’t have family where I live and though I talk to them on the phone quite often I find it hard to express my true emotions because I fear that they will worry about me. This blog has given me the chance to express what I am truly feeling and it makes me feel like I found somewhere that I belong during this whole dark journey.
I wish none of us where in the position that we are in, but I guess if we have to be here at least we have each other. And the company could be a whole lot worse.
Last night J and I had one of the most honest conversations we have ever had since starting this whole thing. We have always felt that we had two different view points to this whole thing that were miles apart. But as it turns out, though they are different issues, we are surprisingly similar. Situations are usually not black and while and it is definitely true in this case. Our issues are far from solved, but I think we finally have a better understanding of each other and where we want to end up in life. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again…I am so blessed to be married to this man.
I also talked to my clinic today and explained our situation and how we felt we needed to take December off. They were extremely supportive and assured us that come January they’d still be willing to help us out with some medication. The lady I deal with is so bright and positive that it is impossible not to feel good after talking to her. She said that we should just try naturally this month and maybe it just might work. (I doubt it but only because the only time I have ovulated this year has been on my 4 medicated cycles) She also told me that 2012 is the year of the dragon and that means good luck. So that is my new mantra. How could you not love that thought? 2012 will bring good luck and a baby.
And on a slightly weird note, my temp jumped up again today. Um…huh? My temp is never above 97.6 unless I am post ovulation and today it was 98.0. I even took it twice because I was so confused. I won’t lie, there was a moment that I thought maybe the bleeding might be implantation bleeding (I have pretty light periods) but then reason entered my mind and I know that it is not possible for implantation bleeding to be like that and last 3 days. Anyone else ever have a temperature rise while on your period?