Before this I whole thing I had only had one other experience with anesthesia. That was when I was 20 and had my wisdom teeth out. That whole procedure was so easy and I found the anesthesia to be kinda fun. I thought it was crazy that he injected something into my iv, started counting down from 10, and by 8 I was gone. The next thing I knew I was being pushed into the car by a nurse and my mom was trying to pull from the other side. Too funny.
This time it was a completely different story. I keep trying to back track to the surgery and the following hours and it kind of disturbs me how little I remember. I was completely terrified of seeing the OR. I thought that the sight of the sterile room with doctors in gowns and masks would completely throw me over the edge. When we were in the “waiting” room they explained that I would not be knocked out till after we arrived in the OR and I was so scared. I shouldn’t have worried though because right after J left they gave me something to “relax” me. I remember thinking that I hope I wasn’t going to have a hard time with the breathing tube like the guy across from me who had just come out of surgery.
Next thing I remember is being woken up at 6:30am by the nurse checking my vitals. It is really unnerving waking up in a room, not knowing how you got there, and with your underwear and bra neatly folded on the foot of the bed when you know YOU didn’t take them off. Talk about awkward.
And this my friends, in my drugged up haze, is the moment that I decided to post on Facebook. Note to anyone going into surgery, have someone take away your phone until you are sobered up. The message wasn’t that horrible, it definitely could have been worse, but it was kind of cryptic. Needless to say I got A LOT of responses.
Because, even though I did not remember coming out of surgery, having J feed me ice chips with a spoon, or talking to the doctor about what had happened, I KNEW my ovary was gone. And I felt the need to share that with the world. I don’t know how I remembered that, I still have no recollection of talking to the doctor about it but apparently it stuck through the cloudiness of the anesthesia.
THIS is why I don’t do drugs. Because I know I am not a rational person and because I really hate this black area where I don’t remember things. I mean how do I really know what happened? I don’t. And I never will. Before going in I asked the anesthesiologist to make sure I stayed asleep. Well done to him! He did a good job.
P.S. Welcome to all those here from ICLW! In case you’re lost, one week ago today I went into the ER and had to have my right ovary removed due to Ovarian Torsion. Slowly but surely recovering. Happy ICLW to everyone!