When I found out this pregnancy was ectopic I did the proper infertile thing and consulted Dr. Google. I did research about Methotrexate, ruptured ectopics and tube loss. I’ve been meticulous about taking care of myself and watching signs and symptoms.

One thing the internet did not prepare me for is the pain that accompanies when the tissue starts to break down. Last night I thought it was over. I woke up with pain on my left side that kept me awake for 3 hours. I was on the verge of heading to the ER when the pain started to subside a bit. I decided I could hold off till morning when I could get a hold of my doctor.

I woke up feeling so sore and so incredibly bloated. Every step is painful and it feels like all my organs are trying to fall out. I talked to my doctor and he reassured me that all this is normal. My beta yesterday came back at 1200. This is an excellent sign as my numbers are dropping steadily.

He said that mild to moderate pain happens when the tissue starts to die. He also suspects that the blood vessels that were supporting the pregnancy are starting to collapse which caused the pain last night and the soreness today. The bloating is coming from the fact that my tube is most likely leaking so my abdomen is full of fluid. What sucks is that my stomach is so full that I do actually look pregnant. Awesome.

At least my mind was set at ease once I spoke to my doctor. He also told me how things will play out from here. Once my levels zero out he will put me on birth control for one month (more on this later but lets just say one month is not enough for us right now) and then around the first of  March we will do a HSG test to check to see if the tube is still functional. Can’t tell you how excited I am about this. I LOVED the last HSG. I hope the sarcasm is dripping from all of your computer screens right now. Luckily I still have some pain killers left over from my surgery that I can take before hand. Not to mention it will take place right around MB’s due date. Yup, pain killers are looking mighty fine.

Right now I am just focusing on getting through the next 2 weeks. Then we will be past the holidays and hopefully my levels will be bottomed out. Then maybe we can find the strength to move on.



Filed under Betas, Depression, Ectopic, Healing, Just my luck, Miscarriage

9 responses to “Um…OUCH!

  1. Fuck. I’m glad the betas are dropping, but this still sucks. Really Universe? Insult to injury followed by more injury??

    Thinking of you

  2. Agh! Another HSG. Suck. Suck. Suck. Any women that claim they feel nothing get a kick in the shin from me. I’m glad you have some pills to pop. I”m also really, really glad that number keeps decreasing. Very glad.

  3. Between your stash and mine, we can have quite a party. Do I see a girls sleepover in our future? Hells to the yeah! Then we can hit up narcotics-anonymous. 2013 is going to be sweet.

  4. The pain pills should do the trick- just pop one or two and make sure you have a ride home! Wish that HSG was not in your near future at all, but glad the numbers seem to be dropping well. Thinking of you.

  5. I am so sorry that you’re going through this. Glad the hcg dropping, thinking of you.

  6. I am so sorry you are going through this. I have heard how terrible the shot is, but I guess it is better than loosing your tube. Ugh – the things we have to go through as women!!!

  7. theyellowblanket

    Sending you strength!

  8. I’m glad to hear your beta level is dropping. Not happy at all to hear how much physical pain you have been experiencing (in addition to the emotional hell you’ve had to deal with). And I’m not happy at all to hear about a 2nd HSG. The one positive thing about already having gone through it means you will not be going in thinking it will be “slightly uncomfortable” as they said. You will be fully prepared and medicated!

  9. Yikes! As if the process wasn’t hard enough emotionally, it has to be painful physically as well?! Sorry. 😦

    Sent from my Samsung Galaxy II

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