*If you are not in a good place in your journey you may want to skip this one. Although I am beyond grateful to finally be a mother, it is not without its challenges. There will always be other posts.
So it seems that right after I wrote last week that Muppet was such a great sleeper something switched. All of the sudden she became a fussy, miserable baby during the night. After a feeding it would take up to an hour to get her back to sleep. She would grunt, groan, wiggle and cry. Nothing I tried seemed to comfort her. It was beyond frustrating and really brought down my confidence as a mother.
Friday morning at around 6:00 am I finally snapped. I’d been up with her most of the night and she still was fussing. In my frustration I broke down into tears. J woke up and took Muppet, telling me to get some rest. Instead I sat in bed and cried feeling like a failure. It didn’t help that it only took him 10 min to get her calmed down and asleep.
Sleep deprivation really messes with you.
Since then things have improved. I spoke to her doctor and he said it sounded like she was having some regurgitation issues. He suggested laying her at an angle after feedings instead of laying her flat. He also said that we could consider switching formulas. We have been lucky so far in that area and have been able to us the Costco brand, but is seems like she was starting to develop a bad tummy so yesterday I pulled the trigger and switched her to Gerber Good Start Gentle. I’m not sure I’ve seen a huge difference so far but its only been one day. I’m hoping that maybe it will be a little easier for her to digest and that the cause of this night-time fussiness was stomachs which will now go away.
I’ve also found a night schedule that helps tremendously. Before now I had just been letting her eat every 3 hours if hungry, rather than try to get her on a strict schedule. But right now, a schedule is what I need. So at 8:00 in the evening I wake her up (if asleep. Her naps are still very unpredictable) and feed her. After that it is bath time which she absolutely loves. Afterwards we do all we can to keep her awake until her next feeding at 11:00.
At 11 she has her bedtime feeding. She usually falls asleep immediately afterwards. She sleeps soundly for the next 5 hours. I wake up with her at 4:00 am for another bottle, sometimes she finishes it all, sometimes she doesn’t. She goes back to sleep and this is usually her fussy stage. She will sleep for an hour or two and then decide that she can’t sleep any longer unless I’m holding her. From 6-7 I hold her in bed. At 7:00 J wakes up for her morning feed and plays with her till 8:30 until he leaves for work. I’m able to get a little more sleep before he leaves and stay somewhat sane.
Before this schedule I was getting up with her anywhere from 2-3 times a night. It was killing me. I was sleeping in 2 hour intervals and if she started fussing I didn’t sleep at all. I’m pretty sure that is what caused the breakdown last week. J was great though, he took the next night and let me get 8 hours of sleep, something I hadn’t had in a really long time. Now I think we will be able to manage. I’m not sure if the formula is going to make a big difference but I have high hopes.
But I’ll tell ya, as hard as the sleep thing is it is all worth it when that baby looks at you and smiles. Yesterday I’m pretty sure I got her first ‘social smile’. Shes smiled in the past but it has always felt like it was for another reason. But yesterday I looked at her and started talking and she broke into a big grin. I tested it over and over with the same result. I love this kid, more than I can say. Just hoping that we can all enjoy a little more sleep in the coming weeks.