Over the past few weeks I’ve had to come to terms with something that I never thought would be so difficult to face: My baby is rapidly becoming a toddler.
I’ve always been a baby person. From the time I was a child I have been obsessed with infants. The way they smell, their tiny little features, the jagged movements of their newly discovered limbs, I love it all. I was also always surrounded by them so it just became a part of my world. I have 3 younger brothers and I am the 2nd oldest grandchild on both sides of my family. I have cousins young enough that they could be Muppet’s siblings. Babies are just a part of my world.
Some people wish they could skip the newborn phase and skip ahead to when children are walking and talking. Not me. If I could time freeze a newborn I think I would be very tempted to do so. Don’t get me wrong, I love toddlers and kids. They are so imaginative and watching them learn and discover the world is incredible. But there is something about snuggling a newborn that is so intoxicating for me.
Muppet is growing up quickly. She will be 9 months on Friday and already has 2 words (Mama and Dog). She crawls faster than I can chase her most of the time and stands up on everything. When she is feeling particularly brave she will take a few tiny steps with her walker. She can stand unassisted for 5-10 seconds. She is becoming extremely independent and will push your hands away if she doesn’t want to be held. She is now a child with her own thoughts and wants.
She still has her moments of ‘baby-ness’. At night before bed she always curls up on my chest and lays there so I can listen to her breath and smell the top of her head. If she falls she immediately crawls over to me for cuddles. Although she is starting to eat a lot of finger food she still is very dependent on her bottle so I get to hold her in my arms and feed her 3-4 hours. I treasure all these moments but there is a part of me that misses the days that I didn’t need these moments in order to snuggle with my baby.
Today she had an allergic reaction (eggs) and it was absolutely terrifying. She broke out in hives and her eyes became swollen and bloodshot. I rushed her to an urgent care and they took good care of her. The reaction never affected her breathing which I am grateful for. We gave her some allergy medication and I watched as she fell asleep in my arms, something that hasn’t happened in a very long time. I’m so grateful for this little girl. If anything ever happened to her I don’t know what I would do, she is my world. So even though I miss her being my teeny tiny baby and sometimes my feelings get a bit hurt when she doesn’t want to sit on my lap, I wouldn’t change a thing about her for the world.
Now she is sleeping soundly in her crib after 2 projectile vomiting incidences. I am emotionally drained, smell faintly of vomit, and incredibly in love with my child. Keep growing my little girl, but maybe try to slow it down just a bit so I can make sure to drink in every moment of your life.