Monthly Archives: January 2015

The Binky Wars

“Bin-ky, Bin-ky, Bin-ky!” echos throughout our house these days. Muppet has recently started using 2 syllable words and calling our for her beloved binky was one of the first she learned. I’ve always had a love / hate relationship with her pacifiers. I love how they are able to quell any tantrums and how they seem to soothe her during long trips in the car or on a plane. I also give them credit for her still taking 2 naps a day. But the older she gets the more they weigh on my conscience.

With the exception of her two-year old molars, Muppet has all her teeth. So the more I see the pacifier in her mouth the more I cringe thinking about the damage they are causing to her mouth. I also naively thought that as she got older she would become less dependant on them, not more. For awhile she would only take on type of pacifier, the soothies that they start babies on in the hospital. We had a few other kinds that people gave us but she refused them all. But over the last month as I’ve slowly started letting the binkys become lost she has decided that any binky will do. She takes them all now, as long as she can stick it in her mouth.

I know it is probably time for me to take control of the situation. She is 17 months old tomorrow and heavily dependant on these stupid things. But every time I think about taking it away I have a moment of panic. Muppet is a really good sleeper most of the time. She goes down at 7:30 (without the binky) and sleeps till 7:30 or 8 the next morning. Yes at some point during the night she does get her binky. On good nights it is between 5 or 6. Meaning she has slept 10-11 hours without it. These are the nights I convince myself that it isn’t a problem right now and I can wait. Then there are nights like last night. She went to be like normal but woke at 11:30 and wouldn’t go back to sleep without her binky. Then she woke at 2:30 and 6:15. Both those times I had to go in and giver her her binky even though it was in the crib with her and had she wanted to, could have grabbed it. Part of the appeal of letting her sleep with the binky is self soothing! Yet I’m still the one going in to give it to her over and over. Plus I absolutely cringe at the thought of her sleeping with it in her mouth for most of the night.

Despite the fact that she goes to bed easily without her pacifier, she will not nap without it. I’ve tried a few times and it was a disaster. And again, she naps twice a day! At 1 1/2 years old! To me this is a major thing and not something I want to end. She needs those naps, on the days she doesn’t get both she is so cranky it is unreal. So the thought of taking the binky away and rocking the boat with the nap thing scares me. We have also reached full-blown toddlerhood (I’ll write a post on this soon) complete with tantrums. Sometimes giving her the binky is the only thing I can do to quell the storm.

I’m seriously at a loss as to what to do guys. Right now I feel the ideal solution is to wean her of the binky at night but let her have it during naps and if needed during the day. The only way to get her off it at night though is to let her cry it out. I have no issue with this, we’ve done it before but she is also a lot different now and I’m scared of the inevitable day that she learns to climb out of her crib and scared that a cry it out session might push her to try.

As you can see my mind is a jumble. I don’t know what to do or how to do it. Can someone else come do this for me? As I type this she is in the middle of a tantrum because I wouldn’t let her throw a book at my head. Binky to the rescue!

Does anyone have any advice? What would you do in my situation?




Filed under Baby Girl, Growing Up, Motherhood, Stay At Home Mom

New year, good year

2014 is gone. It was without a doubt the fastest year of my life. It was the first year that Muppet has been alive for the full 12 months. My days turned into story books, kissing dollies, going to the park and nap schedules. It was the best.

Muppet is now 16 months old and quite a little firecracker. She is one of the sweetest children with the happiest disposition I’ve ever seen. She is full of smiles and laughter. She loves her baby dolls and is constantly hugging them while saying “awww” and patting their little heads. Despite all the she is quite stubborn and dramatic when she doesn’t get her way. She signs “more” all day long and if you say “no” to what she is asking for, the motions get bigger and bigger until she finally melts to the ground in anger. Tantrums shouldn’t be allowed to be that cute.

Now that she is getting older we have had to start making decisions about how we want to proceed with building our family. We have always known that we wanted more than one child. In the early days, before infertility, we had decided on 3-4 kids. Now we are very certain that 2 is going to be our number. I can’t imagine going through more than 2 adoptions. Not only is it too expensive, but the emotional stuff starts to add up quickly. Because we will only be having 2 children, we very much want them to be close in age. 2 years would be our ideal, but that is coming up really quickly. We are aiming for no more than 3 years apart now.

We are hoping to start the adoption process sometime within the next few months. We need to renew our homestudy, which supposedly is not nearly as hard or costly, before we can start the matching process again. I really don’t know what to expect this time around. We will again be pursing trans-racial adoption and hope to get another african-american baby so that Muppet has a family member who looks like her. The fact that we already have a black child could majorly help us. Or birth moms could lean more towards other couples who don’t already have children. It could go either way. I know we will get picked, but it is impossibly to know how long it will take.

I am both incredibly excited and terrified at the thought of another child. I know Muppet will be an awesome big sister but I also think of all the things that are going to be so much harder when there are 2 kids to take care of. 2 nap schedules, 2 night-time issues, 2 different personalities, ect. It is definitely going to be a challenge. But having a baby again is going to be so incredible. I love watching Muppet grow and learn but toddlerhood has come full force to our house and it isn’t always easy. Over the holidays Muppet had her Dad and my mom at her disposal at all times so she decided she never wanted me. If I tried to hold her she would struggle and cry until Daddy or Grandma rescued her. It was incredibly hard on me. But I know it was just the novelty of having someone other that Mom around to give you all their attention. Now that we are back home she is my girl again. Those baby hugs are worth all the tantrums in the world.

I hope that we get as lucky the second time around as we did the first. Although at the moment it is hard to imagine any child topping the one I have right now. I wish you all a wonderful new year and hope all of your dreams come true.




Filed under adoption, BABIES!, Baby Girl, Motherhood, Stay At Home Mom, Trans-racial adoption